Rethinking Fellowship for Women’s Ministry- What is fellowship?

Below you’ll find the show notes for episode 66: Rethinking Fellowship for Women’s Ministry – What is fellowship? from the Women’s Ministry Toolbox Podcast.

Please note: This post contains affiliate links.

The following is an excerpt from Rethinking Fellowship: A Handbook for Hosting Meaningful Women’s Ministry Events. © 2023 by Cyndee Ownbey

Chapter 1 Defining Fellowship

WHAT IS FELLOWSHIP?

The online Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines fellowship as:

1. Companionship, company.
2. Community of interest, activity, feeling, or experience.
3. A company of equals or friends: association.¹

Likewise, Christian fellowship can also be described as companionship, a community of interest, and a company of friends. Yet, Christian fellowship should be noticeably different. Your women’s ministry fellowship shouldn’t be mistaken for a birthday party, baby shower, or game-day cookout. Worldly fellowship and Christian fellowship should differ in décor and content. “Those who believe the gospel are united in the Spirit through Christ to the Father, and that unity is the basis of fellowship.”² Christ sits at the center of Christian fellowship.

Our faith is what unites us no matter what season of life we’re in, what type of job we have (or don’t have), regardless of our marital status or our age. We are sisters in the family of Christ and our gatherings should reflect such. When we focus on the bond that unites us our connection grows stronger. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 reminds us,

“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”

We are better together.

We might assume every women’s ministry event we host carries the marks of a Christian fellowship. As good Christian hostesses, we begin and end with a prayer and include a short devotional. Besides, all the women in attendance know and love Christ, right? Isn’t that all that’s needed? Maybe, but what if God’s design for fellowship is a bit more focused? What if we saturated our events with our faith instead of just sprinkling on a little bit of Jesus?

I challenge you to prayerfully consider how a few tweaks might increase the impact of your fellowship, events, and activities. In most cases, they don’t need an overhaul, they just need a bit of rethinking.

On the pages that follow you’ll find specific ideas and scripture passages to help you and your team host more meaningful women’s ministry events. You’ll learn to select the best fellowship format, décor, door prizes, and devotionals that point women to Christ.

WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY?

What does the Bible say about fellowship? Pulling out my Strong’s Concordance, I discovered some interesting information about fellowship. The Greek word for fellowship, koinonia, is used 12 times in the Bible. Definitions for koinonia include participation and common experiences and interests, recognized and enjoyed.³ While similar to how the world defines fellowship, our common biblical beliefs are key to Christian fellowship.

Scripture describes fellowship as:

1. Partnership in the gospel (Philippians 1:5)
2. Relationship with the Father and with his Son Jesus Christ (1 John 1:3)
3. Relationship with the Holy Spirit (2 Corinthians 13:14)
4. Gathering of believers (Acts 2:42)

Fellowship is about relationship. Relationship with the Father, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, and other believers. I read through each occurrence of koinonia looking for an example of biblical fellowship in the local church. The gathering of believers in Acts 2:42 aligns most closely with fellowship opportunities the church, and women’s ministry programs, offer today.

Before we examine Acts 2:42, let’s look at the context of this passage. Acts 2 takes place on the day of Pentecost where all the believers were gathered in one place. “They were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit gave them utterance.” (Acts 2:4) Everyone could “hear them telling in our own tongues the mighty works of God.” (Acts 2:11b). Peter powerfully preaches a sermon using the scriptures to remind the crowd that the prophet Joel said these things would happen and that David foresaw and spoke about the resurrection of Christ. The people were convicted (v 36) and asked Peter what they must do (v 37). Peter responded, “Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.” (v38) As a result, over 3,000 accepted the message and were baptized.

Acts 2:42-47, says,

“And they devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. And awe came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. And all who believed were together and had all things in common. And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need. And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favor with all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved.”

Every day Christ-followers devoted themselves to meeting in the temple and they broke bread in their homes with joyful and humble hearts. The Lord added to them those who were being saved. They gathered every day as a response to hearing God’s Word. It wasn’t the physical food, the décor, or the people in attendance that drew them in; it was the Word of God and the testimony of other believers. The outpouring of the Holy Spirit resulted in a transformed community of believers. How God must desire we also live life as transformed believers in community.

A simple pattern emerged as God’s people grew in number.

People turning to Christ → Shared worship and meals → shared possessions → shared worship and meals → people turned to Christ.⁴

Bible scholars refer to these gatherings of worship and meals as “table fellowship”. Table fellowship included “music or other entertainment, but also discussion and even lectures… the topic of discussion recommended by Jewish priests was Scripture.”⁵ The fellowship of early Christians centered on worship, sharing, and learning the scriptures. By the 2nd century, pagan values overwhelmed the church and these intimate, scripture-centered, regular times of fellowship began to fade.⁶ The slow fade of faith-focused fellowship began long ago. It’s no wonder our church fellowship events don’t often resemble those of the early Christian church.

Acts is not the only place we find this faith-focused model for fellowship. Jesus established this model for fellowship while He was on the earth, too. In John 13:1-20, we find Jesus and the disciples dining together. Jesus “rose from supper. He laid aside his outer garments, and taking a towel, tied it around his waist. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and to wipe them with the towel that was wrapped around him.” (John 13:3-5) Always teaching, Jesus wanted the disciples to experience and understand the lesson in verses 14-16. “If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you. Truly, truly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him.” As you look through the four gospels, you’ll find additional examples of fellowship with Jesus. It was never about the food; it was always about their faith.

The goal of fellowship in the early church was discipleship. In his reading of Acts 2, Warren Wiersbe notes “the three thousand new converts needed instruction in the Word and fellowship with God’s people if they were going to grow and become effective witnesses.”⁷

Wiersbe points out the early church included four critical elements of discipleship:

1. In depth teaching about their faith
2. Corporate fellowship with other believers
3. Participation in the Lord’s supper
4. Active prayer⁸

Do we not have these same needs today? How should this affect our women’s ministry fellowship offerings? Do we need to rethink our fellowship format so it also encourages discipleship?

Scripture is clear: fellowship among believers should encourage fellowship with Christ.

As we saw in Acts 2 and John 13, fellowship in New Testament times was:

• Gospel focused
• Action oriented

Participation was expected and encouraged. Those in attendance didn’t gather only to eat, they received food and a biblical message. There was usually worship, entertainment, and an opportunity to serve others. How do we practically translate this into the fellowship events we host?

Hosting tips that infuse the gospel in our fellowship:

• Pray at the opening and closing
• Include time for women to pray in small groups
• Encourage women to read God’s Word as a teaching anchored in scripture is shared
• Invite women to share personal stories of God’s faithfulness
• Include a time for corporate worship – sing together
• Highlight God’s Word – out loud, in the decor, in takehome favors, in event publicity
• Offer a service opportunity – service project, donation drive
• Seek to glorify God in everything you do and in every facet of the event

Can you see how a few changes or additions to your Soup and Salad Potluck could strengthen and encourage the faith of your women? Those additions and interactions have the potential to knit your women together, deepening their relationships and connections to one another. There’s no mistake some translations (CEV for one) use the words “like family to each other” instead of the word fellowship. There’s a difference in how we host family members, friends, and acquaintances. The level of formality decreases with familiarity. I spend less time cleaning and fussing when it’s my family. While neither group probably cares about the dust bunnies hiding beneath my dining room furniture, those who grew up with me know I’m not a great housekeeper and there’s no sense in pretending otherwise. I’m able to let my guard down a bit more with my family. The women in your church long to be treated like family. Your vulnerability allows them to be vulnerable. Your efforts to make them comfortable do not go unnoticed. I pray our sisters in Christ will see a difference in the way we host events for them.

Rethinking Fellowship is available for purchase from your favorite online retailer and the Women’s Ministry Toolbox Shop.

Today’s Toolbox Tasks:

1. Take the time (personally and with your team) to reflect on whether or not the fellowships you offer align more closely with the world’s definition or the Bible’s definition of fellowship.
2. Brainstorm practical ways you can adjust your fellowships so that God’s Word and the gospel are the focus and not an afterthought.

My prayer for you:

(Taken from the book’s introduction.)

Lord, please help us to host more meaningful women’s ministry events. Help us to know what types of fellowships, events, and activities our women need so they can become more like Christ. We want our women to grow in godliness, and we ask you to help us plan activities that encourage spiritual growth. Give us wisdom and inspiration to reach every woman in our church. Please guide us and bless our efforts. Amen.

Endnotes

1. Merriam-Webster. “Fellowship”. https://www.merriamwebster.com/dictionary/fellowship.
2. GotQuestions.org. “What is the importance of Christian fellowship?”, https://www.gotquestions.org/Christianfellowship.html.
3. Strong LL.D., S.T.D., James. The New Strong’s Expanded Exhaustive Concordance of the Bible. “Greek Dictionary of the New Testament”. 2001. 141.
4. Keener, Craig S. The IVP Bible Background Commentary New Testament. 2014. 325.
5. Keener. The IVP Bible Background Commentary New Testament. 325.
6. Keener. The IVP Bible Background Commentary New Testament. 325.
7. Wiersbe, Warren W. The Wiersbe Bible Commentary: New Testament. 2007. 329.

ONB Press, Charlotte, NC Copyright 2023 by Cyndee Ownbey
No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher or author, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law.

Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are from The ESV® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.